Forgiveness is the Reward of True Repentance (Part 1)
(republishing, copying, no restrictions)
By: Father Shay
Several readers have written in the past to tell me how important the columns on forgiveness were to them. For those who were taught as a child that the Christian thing to do was to forgive and forget was unbearable and a great burden to bear. They felt that they were being persuaded to submit to acts of abuse, shame, degradation and to cover up crimes in the name of forgiveness.
Others said that they were told that this was the will of God - to suffer, remain silent and forgive as Jesus did. They were made to believe that there was no better recourse for wrong done to them. They were gravely misled. I was happy when they told me how they found peace when they realised through the column, that Jesus never meant forgiveness to be a cover up of crime and sin but that He taught that the sinner must be challenged to repent and believe the gospel, then forgiveness will follow. As a result of these letters I return to the subject of forgiveness and repeat some of those enduring thoughts and reflections that readers found so helpful.
"Forgive them father for they know not what they do", are the most powerful words forgiveness in history. Jesus dying in the most barbaric way known pleads for his executioners asking the Father for them to be forgiven, not granting it. Beside him the repentant thief admitted his guilt and begged not to be forgotten; "This day you will be with me in Paradise", Jesus promised. The prodigal son in the Gospel story, admits his sins, begs forgiveness and is embraced by his forgiving father.
The gospel writings have many examples of the power of forgiveness. When Jesus raised the paralytic, he did it by telling him "Your sins are forgiven", and he was cured. The elements of forgiveness are clear, acceptance and admission of guilt, a true commitment to change and acceptance of responsibility and penance.
For some people forgiveness is a magic cure for all disharmony and dispute; "forgive and forget", they say. But is it really that easy, that Jesus would agree? I don't think so, there is more to it than that.
Take the case of Rosaline, a young twelve-year-old girl who is a domestic servant in the home of her auntie near Manila. She was weak, vulnerable and her auntie was one who held that children are something to be owned and used by adults. Her husband thought the same and lusted after her frail body. He crept into her small bedroom at night and quickly overpowered and raped her. "If you tell anyone I will kill you and feed your parts to the dogs", he threatened.
Rosaline was terrified and kept the terrible ordeal to herself. She was abused several more times and then somehow she found the courage to tell her adult friend Jennifer - a neighbour who befriended her, gave her shelter and reported it to the police.
The Auntie of Rosaline called her a liar and defended her husband. He was arrested and brought to trial. Her Auntie tried to shame and intimidate Rosaline before the trial, "Forgive him, she said, what good will it do to destroy his life and family. It is the Christian thing to do. Forgive your enemies, turn the other cheek or God will not forgive you, remember the Our Father, 'Forgive us our sin as we forgive those who sin against us'", she quoted, "if you don't, we will never forgive you", she said.
Jennifer, unlike some, who would just turn away, was a woman of character and moral principle. She knew a crime when she saw it. Outraged she brought Rosaline to the PREDA Children's Home for protection, proper legal assistance and therapy.
After weeks behind bars and the hardship of a
Philippine prison, Mr. Garcia, the child rapist came to his senses much
like the prodigal son. The harsh conditions and poor food sapped his
arrogance and energy to maintain pretence of innocence. His conscience
awakened in the dark night of deprivation and to the amazement of all he
pleaded guilty during his arrangement. He knew he would have to endure a
long sentence but preferred to do it with a clean conscience and the
forgiveness of his victim. Rosaline was ready and willing to forgive him
after his admission and after justice was done. The judge also gave him
the lowest sentence allowed.
(To be continued)
